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Dear Star Savior,
I'm Britney Spears, a troubled 25-year-old pop star trying to rebuild a career. I just heard that someone at Playboy said the magazine would be happy to have me pose nude. They haven't made an offer, but I don't think I would do it, anyway. After my bad performance at the Video Music Awards, I'm really trying to focus on getting my career back on track. I think being in Playboy would hurt my comeback. You agree, right?
Dear Britney Spears,
Think of yourself like a boxer who blacks out after taking a nasty punch, then wakes up and wins after realizing that he's actually left-handed. This probably is the last thing you want to hear, but Playboy is perfect for you now. Your skill set has changed, so you should change with it. I understand why you might be a little gun-shy while you're rebuilding your music career, especially since you're having problems with singing, dancing and lip-synching. But you can't go wrong with this one: If you do any singing, dancing or lip-synching at Playboy, you're trying too hard. Don't let your all recent crotch flashing go to waste. Now, you can call it job training.
The Star Savior
Dear Star Savior,
I'm Kid Rock, a successful 36-year-old musician. After a show Saturday night, I got into a brawl at a Waffle House restaurant in Atlanta, and I ended up spending 12 hours in the county jail as a result. Here's what happened: A guy in Waffle House recognized a girl in my entourage, and they had words. Then, the whole thing escalated into a fight between me and this guy out in the parking lot. Afterward, my entourage and I hopped on the tour bus and got out of there. We got about a mile away before the police stopped us and arrested me and five of my boys for battery. Was I wrong to get into a fight for my entourage girl?
Dear Kid Rock,
I applaud you for going the extra mile to reconnect with your redneck roots by going to a Waffle House and getting into a fight: Most of your peers simply would have gone back to the hotel and ordered room-service food or sent a roadie out to pick something up. To answer your question, yes, you were wrong to defend your entourage girl by fighting: Groupies are disposable. But the greater wrong here is related to logic. The next time you feel your redneck urges bubbling up and you can only satisfy them with a Waffle House fight, don't use your tour bus as a getaway car. With your name and picture on its sides, your bus was like a one-man police lineup.
The Star Savior
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