Amy Winehouse's smoking problem

Dear Star Savior,

Hi. It’s Amy Winehouse. I checked back into a hospital this week, just three days after I spent a few days there for testing. I have some smoking-related lung problems, and my doctor has told me to quit smoking, but I’ve been struggling with it. What do you think I should do?


Dear Amy,

Most people would say you were failing by smoking after your doctor told you to quit, but I saw that you had a strategy. You weren’t falling off the wagon. You were trying to quit smoking by breaking your lungs. That’s thinking inside the carton.

You saw what your doctor couldn’t see: If you ever quit smoking, you would overdose on fresh air. That's because you are one of the great smokers of our time, equally talented with both cigarettes and crack. And you're too good at it to quit now.

But if you have to quit smoking, nicotine patches aren’t enough. It’s time to go radical.

It looks like the best way for you to quit smoking is to have your hands removed. On top of being smoke-free, if you give up your hands, you’ll lose a few pounds.

But if you'd like to try using your hands for something other than smoking, there are other ways to quit. For example, to cut down on your smoking at home, try a gas leak. At the worst, you’ll only fall off the wagon once.

The Star Savior